MY EXPERIENCE AS A COLLEGE SMALL GROUP LEADER AT CEDAR HEIGHTS CHURCH
By Justin "Larry" Kurtz
MY EXPERIENCE AS A COLLEGE SMALL GROUP LEADER AT CEDAR HEIGHTS:
A Critical Review of Cultural Practices Within “The Network,” including how I was told by my pastor that leaving his church to attend a Catholic church was "running away from the Lord"
- Author: Justin “Larry” Kurtz | Small Group Leader
- Attended: Cedar Heights Church, State College, PA | 2019-2021
- This story was published April, 2024
My Experience at Cedar Heights and with “The Network”
The Network of churches has a primary focus of planting in college towns in efforts to recruit young, impressionable members into community with Christ. I was one of those young people.
Halfway through my freshman year at Penn State, I started attending the church plant in State College called Cedar Heights. The people at Cedar Heights did a wonderful job of making me feel included and welcomed and I grew tremendously in my knowledge of the bible and my love for Jesus.
SUPERNATURAL EXPERIENCES
After only 2 months of attending Cedar Heights, I was graciously invited to attend the Network Conference where I was greeted with open arms by friends and family of those who had planted in State College from Carbondale, Illinois. At this Network conference, I was exposed to spectacles of supernatural experiences such as the speaking of tongues and a few exorcisms that happened directly after services during prayer time.
An exorcism, which I had never seen before, looked like someone laying on the floor and screeching terribly while church leaders prayed over them. After seeing these things, I quickly leaped into loving Cedar Heights. I was sure that I had finally come into contact with the real Holy Spirit.
Looking back now, it is clear The Network relies heavily on such Supernatural experiences to keep the inner circle engaged in the church and believing that there is “something different” about this group of believers.
Looking back now, it is clear the Network relies heavily on such Supernatural experiences to keep the inner circle engaged in the church and believing that there is “something different” about this group of believers. Tongues were only to be spoken at Team Meetings (an exclusive church service only for people that served within the church). Demons were a normal discussion topic at series classes, which is a supplemental curriculum created to influence an individual's beliefs on certain topics. In fact, I had a a friend who told me that our small group leader said he may have a demon because he wouldn’t break up with a partner the leader didn’t approve of due to issues of sin. His small group leader, whom I love deeply, was simply following the teaching provided to him.
DATING OUTSIDE "THE NETWORK" WAS FROWNED UPON
My first noticeable issue with the cultural practices of Cedar Heights surfaced when I started to date a young lady that attended a different church. Even though there was nothing wrong with our relationship, I was frequently reminded of the fact that she "was not in the family" which meant that "we" (the church leadership) didn't know “what she struggles with”. Therefore, dating her was a risk because she was from a different church so she may lead me astray, or even worse, outside of Cedar Heights.
I was frequently reminded of the fact that my girlfriend who didn't attend Cedar Heights "was not in the family" which meant that "we" (the church leadership) didn't know “what she struggles with.”
Dating outside of "The Network" is frowned upon for core members since this network of churches requires a large dedication to the local church, which can be a beautiful thing. Nevertheless, I am not in favor of telling your young, impressionable followers that dating outside of the church is wrong. I did decide to part ways with this young lady for reasons unrelated to religion but the pressure from my leaders to only date someone within the church presented undue stress and tension between the two of us.
BECOMING A SMALL GROUP LEADER; NOT SUPPORTED IN TAKING AN INTERNSHIP
Fast forward to 2020, I began to lead a small group. This was a rewarding experience as I loved to watch my friends and myself grow closer to Christ through fraternity and reading of the word.
During this time, I was in college and got an offer to take an internship with the United State Department of Agriculture in Vermont for a summer. It is common practice in The Network to consult your leaders before making any large life decisions, whether it be a relationship or a job, so I felt that I needed approval from my “leaders” to engage in this personal and career development opportunity.
It is common practice in “The Network” to consult your leaders before making any large life decisions, whether it be a relationship or a job.
In the conversation with my lead pastor, Dan Digman, I was never told not to take the internship, but I was reminded that Jesus puts priority on the local church as opposed to a career or school. I decided to accept the internship offer, but in the months leading up to me leaving for Vermont, I felt like my decision was not supported. My small group leader, Josh, once said that it would be best for me and the church if I didn’t take the internship. In the majority of church circles, that isn’t the normal Christian reaction. Everyone that I trust most encouraged me to take the opportunity, except for my church leaders.
Cedar Height’s reaction was a counter-cultural practice which is manipulative and not based in the love of Jesus, who, for the record, never stayed in one place long. Couldn’t I fulfill the Great Commission while completing my internship?
Admittedly, I wrestled with sin issues while I was in Vermont but I also grew tremendously in my faith as I explored.
CEDAR HEIGHTS DID NOT TANGIBLY SERVE THE GREATER STATE COLLEGE COMMUNITY
I heard many slanders on the Catholic church while at Cedar Heights, so I decided to check it out and realized that it wasn't nearly as bad as it had been portrayed to me. In fact, I admired the charitable focus of the Catholic church, and recognized how Cedar Heights was not living out this explicit command given by Jesus himself (see Matthew 25:31-46).
I began to get frustrated with the lack of community service at Cedar Heights so I again talked to my pastor, Dan Digman, about the situation. He said that the New Testament focuses primarily on serving within the local church first and that our efforts would be better dedicated toward individual acts of service.
Lead pastor Dan Digman said that the New Testament focuses primarily on serving within the local church first and that our efforts would be better dedicated toward individual acts of service.
I’m down with individual acts of service, but let’s think critically for a second about the mission of the Network. They go and “plant” churches in college towns. Those churches collect money to support the local church and then some of those funds go back to The Network.
So, a group of people move to a different region to extract resources that will be sent back to their origin, with little to no return of services to the affected community. What does that sound like? That is colonization and contrary to a biblical belief of generosity for the people around you, and especially for strangers (see Proverbs 19:17, Deuteronomy 15:11, Luke 14:13-14, and Hebrews 13:2). And the lack of initiative for community service makes it evident that The Network is unjustly colonizing by “planting” churches in college towns without any incentive to tangibly serve the community it belongs to. Additionally, Jesus makes it clear that the difference between true believers and non-believers, is humble service to those in need (again, see Matthew 25:31-46).
LEADERS WERE FURIOUS WHEN I DECIDED TO LEAVE CEDAR HEIGHTS CHURCH
When I decided that I would leave the church, first, I told my assistant pastor, Nick Bastian. Nick appeared very supportive and loving in the whole ordeal. He wished me well on my merry way.
Nick phoned my former small group leader and Cedar Heights Worship Leader, Josh Darling, to share the news. Josh called me and was furious with what he had heard. He told me three times that he needed to talk with me and that I needed to "think long and hard" about my decision because he had questions. Shortly after, the lead pastor, Dan texted me telling me that we needed to talk.
When the worship leader Josh Darling heard that I was leaving the church, he called me and was furious with what he had heard. He told me I needed to "think long and hard" about my decision because he had questions.
My conversation with Dan is how I knew that I wasn't meant to be at Cedar Heights. He was incredibly abrasive as he started the conversation by saying something along the lines of "I'm really not looking forward to having this discussion". He was definitely pissed with the news he had received and I interpreted his body language to be combative.
Dan continued to tell me that he couldn't bless my decision, that the Holy Spirit wouldn't move in a Catholic Church like it did at Cedar Heights, and that I was only running away from the Lord. He went as far as trying to humiliate me by ambushing me with sinful actions from when I was gone. My problem with this is that these were things I shared with a friend of mine who is a small group leader that assured me he would not tell anyone.
Lead pastor Dan Digman told me that he couldn't bless my decision to leave, that the Holy Spirit wouldn't move in a Catholic Church like it did at Cedar Heights, and that I was only running away from the Lord.
A few things I want to note here in an effort to highlight spiritual abuse from this conversation:
- Exhibiting hostility towards a congregation member for leaving the church is not acceptable from leadership, no matter the reason. (see James 3:1)
- Telling someone that they won't "experience the Holy Spirit" somewhere else is a lie. I currently go to a Lutheran church, and I without a doubt feel the Holy Spirit there and in all the Catholic Churches I’ve visited.
- Throwing sins in someone's face is a classic control mechanism.
- When someone shares something with you in confidence, that should stay confidential. I understand that my friend may have been concerned, but he should have asked me before sharing that information. You may not be able to trust the leaders at Cedar Heights with your private information, and it hurts me to say that.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
At the end of the day, I'm not here to throw mud. I'm here to tell my truth, and my truth is my experience.
I'm also here to say my opinion, which is that the practices in The Network, such as a fear of demons, a very outright use of dramatized charismatic gifts such as tongues, a heavy focus on loyalty to the church, and a lack of overall transparency is indicative of indoctrination and cult-like behavior.
I am not saying that I don’t believe in demons, but I highly doubt what I witnessed early on was a real exorcism. No one that I trust outside of The Network has ever seen or experienced anything similar to this. How is it that no one else in my family has ever seen anything like this, but I casually saw two or three while at a three day church conference? I firmly believe it is an act orchestrated by Steve Morgan, who, in my opinion, is no stranger to deception, considering he is a sex offender and neglected to make that transparent to his followers within a multi-million dollar religious organization consisting of families and children.
My concern is for those with little faith background that may be dedicating their life to following leaders that are knowingly or unknowingly engaged in a cult network disguised as a Church for Christ.
I share well wishes with my brothers and sisters at Cedar Heights because I know they are simply trying to grow closer with themselves and their faith. My concern is for those with little faith background that may be dedicating their life to following leaders that are knowingly or unknowingly engaged in a cult network disguised as a Church for Christ.
Peace and Love,
Justin “Larry” Kurtz
BACK TO STORIES:
STORIES: Read the stories from those who have left Steve Morgan's Network of Churches
HELP OTHERS HEAL
Consider donating to the National Association for Christian Recovery (NACR), a 501.c.3 non-profit whose primary purpose is to help provide resources to recover from abuse (including spiritual abuse) and addiction. Leaving The Network admires the work of NACR but is not associated with their organization.